I was featured in an article for Bold Journey. I enjoyed having the opportunity to speak about my book and my passion for yoga. Here’s that article.
Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Krista Oakes. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Hi Krista, so happy to have you with us today and there is so much we want to ask you about. So many of us go through similar pain points throughout our journeys and so hearing about how others developed certain skills or qualities that we are struggling with can be helpful. Along those lines, we’d love to hear from you about how you developed your ability to take risk?
I believe to take risk you have to find courage. To find courage you have to acknowledge what’s at stake and determine that what’s on the other side of the risk is worth taking the leap. Courage means taking action despite the feeling of fear and without any guarantees.
I recently published a book called “Shedding Shame: Finding Freedom to Live an Authentic Life.” And it was very scary because it’s very personal. In it, I write about the shame I felt growing up with gay parents in the 80’s. I’m actually the biological child of two gay parents who went on to find their same s*x life partners. We were a very close family but we had a secret. This was a secret I held very close to my heart for the majority of my life. I didn’t share my story because of fear of what others would think about me and my family. And for real fear of harm both physical and emotional. When I was younger I wasn’t willing to take that risk.
As an adult, I experienced more shame in my marriage which ultimately led to divorce. There were challenges with mental illness and infidelity with my husband which once again I chose to keep a secret. I felt shame for what was happening and didn’t want anyone to know how difficult things were.
But after getting divorced I did a lot of work on myself to come to a place where I no longer wanted to live with that shame. My book is about this journey and the tools I discovered to help me live more authentically. When it came time to publish, the old familiar fear would creep back in and made me question my decision to let the world know my story. But I knew my story was valuable. I knew it was important to share. And I knew it could help others who are also struggling with shame which is likely preventing them from living their best, most authentic life.
I had to recognize that by taking the risk and moving through my fear, I would not only further benefit my own journey by claiming my voice and taking back my power, but that it would inspire others to do the same. When I would start to feel the fear, I would remind myself of what’s at stake. To not tell my story, would be perpetuating the “playing small” that I did throughout my life. It would be letting all those that made me feel shame have power over me. I had to overcome that fear to show that being vulnerable and owning your truth will always be more important than the fear. By taking the risk, I am freeing myself to live a more happy and authentic life. And I get to show others it’s possible and perhaps inspire them to find the freedom to live their most authentic life.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I’m a yoga instructor. But not the kind that gets you twisted up like a pretzel. I teach gentle yoga classes that are centered around being mindful. For me yoga, above everything else, is a practice in awareness. The postures and the breath are there to help you stay aware and in the present moment. The more moments we are present ON the mat, the more present moments we can have OFF the mat. And it’s in the present moment where you can find peace, calm, and joy in your life.Yoga is accessible to all. It doesn’t matter your physical or mental health. There’s something beneficial it can offer. I love it when a new student discovers that they can indeed do yoga when they thought it was inaccessible to them. Yoga is one of those practices that once you discover it, it will forever be a part of you, even as you evolve and change because the practice can evolve and change with you.
I offer chair and gentle yoga classes both online and in person. I was able to adapt during the pandemic to teaching hybrid classes and now have a large community of students that practice online from all over the country. I offer several yoga and meditation retreats throughout the year where students have the opportunity to withdraw from every day life and recharge, replenish, and re-balance your body, mind and soul. The most valuable part of these retreats is the connection and community that students experience during this shared time together.
Most recently, in January 2024 I published a book, “Shedding Shame: Finding Freedom to Live an Authentic Life.” In it, I take you on a journey of my life challenges. I share my path to unravel the shame holding me back, where I’ve been, and how it’s gotten me to where I am today, living my best, authentic life. I want my life story to offer you hope as you discover ways you might be able to heal. And I want it to offer you inspiration to find the courage to live your most authentic life. It’s not an instructional book about yoga but yoga is a theme throughout the book as it is an integral part of who I am.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
I think one of the most valuable things I have ever learned is meditation. When I was in college, my mom gave me the gift of a meditation course and I’ve been meditating every since. I learned what meditation is and what it isn’t. I learned that the most important part of meditation is to show up for yourself, to be still, and to just be. I owe meditation to much of my happiness and success in life. Now I teach meditation and help others discover its value. Many students tell me that they’ve tried to meditate but can’t because there mind is too busy. Then after actually learning how to meditate they discover they actually can meditate and they get to experience all the benefits of a regular meditation practice.
I have to say that yoga has been one of the most impactful tools on my journey through life. Yoga is about so much more than yoga postures like downward facing dog and child’s pose. Yes, yoga has helped me stay fit and healthy especially as I’m aging. But more importantly, yoga has taught me mindfulness. Yoga is a way of life that centers around mindfulness. When you learn to go through life with an attention and an awareness to all things, it benefits everything that you do. With a regular practice of yoga, I’m able to pause before I act or speak so that I can consciously respond rather than react to what life throws at me. Yoga has helped me be kinder to myself and minimize the negative self-talk that has often cluttered my mind. It’s taught me to be intentional, grateful and faithful. I truly can’t imagine where I’d be without the regular practice of yoga and all
The advice I offer to students that are interested in yoga is to make self-care non-negotiable. The hardest part of any yoga class is showing up. Once you’re there, you can relax the body and the mind and reap the benefits. But the showing up part is challenging. I recommend that you make appointments with yourself for self-care like you would a doctor’s appointment or lunch date with a friend. Put it in your calendar as a non-negotiable appointment. When you make the commitment to yourself and stop scheduling other things over yourself, you affirm you value and worth.
Who is your ideal client or what sort of characteristics would make someone an ideal client for you?
My idea student has a desire for health & happiness.
They want to Increase their physical stamina so they can feel more flexible, less sore, have better posture and be stronger in their body. My student wants to learn yoga practices that support their exact body type, so they can be confident in everyday activities and have less worry about getting hurt. They are interested in meditation and breath work exercises that allow them to stay calm and peaceful, even in agitated situations. And they are longing for meaningful conversations and connection with people on a regular basis as a foundation for easy and new friendships.
My ideal student is looking for regular activity that includes physical exercise, mental engagement, and spiritual relaxation. They want to move better, think better, and age better. Ultimately, they want to live better.